I still haven't heard anything in reference to my dossier. It seems funny to me that it is a tangible set of paperwork with my name all over it and no one really seems to know where it is. It arrived at the MFA on April 28...so that means it's been in Kaz for over 4 months. The hope of course is that it has already been assigned to a region, because if not, it may be sent back because I put a gender preference on my home study report. I found out this week that several of my friend's dossiers have been sent back, meaning that they will have to start over.....I am crushed for these families. I cried myself to sleep the other night just thinking about it. I want to cry now. On the positive side for them, they have already started on plan B.
It's really gotten more complicated in Kaz these days. If I have to start over this is what I may have to deal with; There may be a list coming out that only allows 10 agencies to be licensed to adopt in Kaz. They will have to be Hague accredited. All dossiers will probably now have to go through DC and each agency may only be able to send off 5 a month...making the wait time longer. They may pass a law making singles unable to adopt. My age may soon become a factor with the age of the child I am allowed to adopt. Oh and more money to start again!
SO.......I don't want to have to start over. My heart is in Kazakhstan with my son or daughter! I keep thinking someone will just say "What are we doing? There are orphans here who need families...there are families that want a chance to love a child .....let's just ask them if they will take either and go from there". Please someone just ask me.........I would and could love a child of either gender....just please give me the chance!
I am asking for divine intervention at this point.....I am scared and in limbo. I am the kind of person that tries to do things on my own, I have been alone for most of my life and am fiercely independent......but I am asking you all to just pray for me to find my child in Kazakhstan...soon. Thank you.
12 comments:
I am most definitely praying for you!! This has been a long and hard process, I do believe that it will all work out YOU will be holding YOUR BABY soon, I am a lot like you almost every sentence you wrote I could relate to, fiercely independant, single and ready to take on the biggest of battles- well don't worry you aren't alone, and even though you are facing some dark days, you will have some bright ones too! Hang in there! Katie
You are in my thoughts and prayers...I hope that your dossier has found a region, and that you will find your son in Kaz! Do not feel alone, there are many of us that are frustrated and discouraged at times with this process, you have many friends thinking of you and knowing exactly what you are going through. At times this whole process seems like madness! Stay strong.
...You never leave our hearts and prayers.
The most difficult part of adoption is trusting time and trusting that the quite time that passes will end with a simple phone call and the words "we have a match..."
While we wait in silence it's faith that gives us strength.
You have incredible strength, it comes through each posting. As one of your many many friends, we are here to remind you that during times like this.. "Things happen for a reason and our paths are not always paved by us..."
Remain open and strong…Sam will come home.
Kari
Lisa, I have been praying for you and Sam since the day we "met" and will continue to do so.
Rose
Lisa,
just wanted you to know that you and Sam are also on my list of families that I cover in prayer. God's timing... his plan.. lean on him....
Have a blessed week... and know we are holding you up in prayer!
Lanetta Gobble
Lisa:
The waiting must be driving you crazy---the wait for region assignment must have been hard, but this complete not knowing must be taking a toll. How is it that they don't know where your dossier is? How crazy!!
Please know that you are in my prayers! (and your perseverance is to be admired...it will serve you well in parenting!)
Thank you for sharing your journey, even during these, the most frustrating of times. Like you, we too are adopting from Kaz. We are waiting for this 'list' to come out and hoping and praying that our agency will be on it. I pray too that someone will realize that there are families, FAMILIES! waiting for these babies. You'll be in my prayers.
:)
I was thinking about you and just wanted to let you know...
Although another day has ended, it has closed with many perfect strangers praying for you and Sam.
Kari
Still praying for you and Sam. Our dossier was sent back from Kaz as well, just resubmitted, hoping we can get our little guy (2, cleft lip/palate) home before it all comes apart. (or so it feels like some days). Good luck and know that there is a child for you out there. Jacqueline
I have tears in my eyes as I write this—the uncertainty you (PAPs) face today is far greater than we have experienced (and that was only 5 months ago). I can't imagine how I'd be doing right now under the circumstances that exist today.
We adopted an older child (a boy who was almost 6) from the preschool in Uralsk and was shocked to learn that only 5% of the children there were "legally available" for adoption. I just couldn't imagine what my son's playmates were thinking when they first learned that he had a mama and a papa. Gotcha Day was one of the hardest days for me—leaving all those beautiful children behind.
Lisa, you will find your forever child—you will not have to start over. Your desire to parent is too strong for that not to happen.
My prayers are with you,
Karen
LIsa,
I hadn't read blogs in a while so I am just reading this post. Like all the other it made me cry. I have cried myself to sleep the last few nights. Even though I have plan B, it is hitting me hard that plan A is over with.
I know that you keep me in your thoughts and prayers and I do the same for you. I am thinking of you every day and I believe Sam will be found.
Keep the faith.
Mary
We're still here and thinking of all the Kaz families. It just sickens us to see so many CHI KAZ families now dropping out of the program. We too are in limbo and really are running out of options. We hope and pray that everyone will find a son or daughter.
Thinking of you each and every day.
The Kelleys
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